Loser I said to myself

Loser

You’ll never amount to anything.

You are ugly.

Why try, you can’t do anything right.

What an idiot.

You’re stupid.

You couldn’t do it if you tried.

You’re an loser.

These are the words floating through many people’s heads every day, they are saying it to their selves and believing it.  Their subconscious grabs on to it and will not let go, until they push it out with something completely opposite.  The devil is in control and happy when the negativity abounds in our minds. What can we do to combat the negative self talk?

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.

Proverbs 23:7

Bitterness

Monday

Bitterness

Then I realized that my heart was bitter,
      and I was all torn up inside.
 I was so foolish and ignorant—
      I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you.

Psalms 73:21-22

It starts with bitterness.  The bitterness could come from childhood verbal abuse where you repeatedly heard negative, hurtful comments.  These comments stuck with you until you believed them and let them grind into your psyche until they became a part of you. 

The bitterness could come from a failure where you start the negative self talk on a very small level.   It could come from a bully at school that pulled the negativity out of nowhere.  It could come from a boss or a spouse, sibling, coach or teacher. 

However it starts, it has taken root in your soul and now it has become you.  The negative talk never stops; it’s in your head constantly; a tidal wave of thoughts and emotions that constantly work to keep you down.

Now what?  You are defined by these steady words, thoughts and actions that just won’t go away, in spite of you wanting them to.  You know it’s wrong, but you can’t stop.  This habit is ingrained in you. 

Help.

Lord, please give me the wisdom to recognize negative self talk.  I want to identify it so I can combat it with your help.  Amen.

A Little Bit at a Time

Tuesday

A Little Bit at a Time

 If you love learning, you love the discipline that goes with it— how shortsighted to refuse correction!

Proverbs 12:1

I thought I was a hard worker, until I met my husband.  We would start a job together. I would look at the enormity of it and declare, “There is no way we can do this!”  “Just a little bit at a time” he would say.  I would be amazed at what we could accomplish just a little bit at a time.  The first job was the floor for a kennel for our dogs.  We poured the first bag of concrete and it seemed to just barely make a difference on the dirt floor of the kennel.   Eventually though, as we just kept working, the floor was complete.

We’ve done so many seemingly impossibly jobs together, so  now, I have no problem getting started.  I know that soon, we will have made a lot of progress on the task. 

This has to be your attitude in tackling the negativity in your head, just a little bit at a time.  One word at a time.  One second at a time.

How?

God.

Prayer.

Diligence.

Desire.

You’ve got to decide that you want to change.  You have to realize that it IS possible.  You have to try.

Dear Lord, please give me the desire to make changes in my thinking.  Help me to destroy the old tapes in my head and replace them with new ones. 

Amen.

Ask God for Help

Wednesday

Ask God for His Help

Avoid worthless, foolish talk that only leads to more godless behavior. This kind of talk spreads like cancer.                                    2 Timothy 2: 16-17

First of all ask God for His help.   Seriously, ask God for His help.  Get down on your knees, admit you know you have a problem and engage the almighty God in tackling this issue you have.

Next, work on identifying the negative self talk.   Some professionals suggest you have a trigger, perhaps a rubber band around your wrist.  Each time you identify a negative thought, pop yourself on the wrist.  This will help you become aware of how often you are doing “it”.

If you can identify your internal negative dialogue, half of the battle is won.  So much of it is done without you even knowing you’re doing it. 

Experts have linked a pessimistic attitude with higher rates of infectious disease, poor health, and earlier mortality.  Trust me on this, there is nothing in it for you to be so negative.  Identify it!

Optimists tend to experience less stress than pessimists. They believe in themselves and their abilities, thus they expect good things to happen.  Negative events are only minor setbacks to be overcome.  Positive events are evidence of further good things to come.  Because they believe in themselves, they take more risks and create more positive events in their lives.

It just makes sense to try and change this part of your life.  Negative self talk isn’t doing anything for you.

Lord, I really want to change this part of my life.  I’m tired of being sick and tired.  I want my words to be uplifting and hopeful, help me to change my negative patterns.   Amen.

Change the Pattern

Thursday

Change the Pattern

 The tongue can bring death or life.

Proverbs 18:21

You’ve asked God for His help.  You’ve identified the negative patterns.  Now, it’s time to change the patterns.   

Have you ever watched as the highway department decides to move a highway?  It takes a lot of work and a lot of time.  So goes it for changing the patterns of your self talk.  But wow, when the new highway is built, it was really worth it!  And, when you re-learn positive self talk, it will be worth it!   

One way is simply to replace a poor choice of words with a good choice of words:  “I can’t do this, I’m a failure,” replaced with, “I’m going to do my best and I’m sure I can improve.”

Another way, maximize your successes and minimize your failures.  Doing this pushes you towards optimism.  I’m a borderline narcissist, so I’m GREAT at this, but for others, it’s extremely difficult.  You have to retrain your brain.

Yet another way is to use positive affirmations, these are a great tool to reprogram your unconscious mind from negative thinking to positive.  This operates the same way that negative self-talk does, but in a way that benefits you.  Create statements in the positive, (“I’m healthy,” not “I wish I wasn’t sick.”) that are realistic, state them as if already true (“I’m healthy,” not “I wish I was healthy”), and repeat them often, in words or sticky notes.  A great example for me would be, “I am calm and relaxed no matter what the situation.”

For you?

“I love my life and speak positive words about myself and my life!”

Lord, help me to replace my negative words with positive ones.  Help me to believe in myself and my life and verbalize it often. 

Amen.

Use the Tools

Friday

Use the Tools

Let my soul be at rest again, for the Lord has been good to me.     Psalm 116:7

The subconscious mind is very, very powerful.  It will manifest health, success and abundance just as easily as disease, failure and poverty. It works to reproduce in our life according to what we have impressed upon it.  The more repetition and feelings that we link to a certain thing, the subconscious will bring it to life, regardless good or bad.  It does not judge, and as long as you believe certain things to be true, it will accept without question. 

But you say, “I really believe this life is not worth living and it can’t and won’t get any better, what’s the point of trying any more?”  I  say to you, if you really feel this way, what have you got to lose?  Why not just try to change your inner core belief about life and yourself and your situation?

Here is the deal, alone; it is difficult if not impossible.  With God and supporters through church, or small group, it becomes easier.  In order to allow encouraging affirmations to flow out of you and around in your head, you need positive vibes going your way.  Without optimistic reinforcement, your well of hopefulness will run dry. 

Give yourself the tools you need to turn your thinking around. Read the bible, go to church, find a forward thinking book and join a small group.  Flood that barren crevasse of your brain with so many positive and uplifting words, phrases and images that there is no way anything else will flow out of it.

You’ll be healthier and happier as will those around you!

Dear Lord, help me to use the tools You have placed in my life.  I want to be a happy soul for myself and those around me.

Amen.